Yesterday I went to a Meetup with friends where we discussed ways in which we stay positive in our day to day lives.
Since 2020 I have been on a self-care and identity journey.
I have read hundreds of books on the subject and written thousands of pages on self-care and identity at this point so this was something I have extensive knowledge and experience in.
In our meetup some people talked about having a gratitude practice, some talked about journaling, some talked about spirituality. It was an overall interesting conversation.
I talked about the power of our thoughts and positive thinking. That what we focus on we manifest. If we focus on the positive, we will see more of that and manifest that into our reality. If we focus on the negative we will manifest more of that. That what we focus on good or bad, it was being manifested.
And with that understanding I explained how I focus on the positive in all aspects of my life and what that means to me.
I even have catch phrases to remind me to focus on the positive, such as “assume the best” or “assume the positive“.
I suppose you can call these mantras.
How it works is this.. from my last post about understanding how our thoughts trigger our emotions and feelings, we know that what our thoughts are focused on will manifest into feelings and emotions.
With that knowing, I purposely scan my environment for the good, for the exciting, for the beauty. I scan my environment for that one good thing and focus my thoughts on that thing.
As I focus my thoughts on that thing, I have associated emotions and feelings related to that thing.
If I can’t see something positive in my environment, I make it up or “assume the best“.
If it’s for something in the future, I “assume the best” outcome.
I assume that whatever happens is happening for my best and highest good and that I will gain something positive out of the experience.
In the past I would focus on negative or what could go wrong and funny enough I would experience that more often than not.
What I learned was that what you are thinking about, you will find. Our mind will scan the environment looking for the thing that is on your mind.
I think for the most part people know and understand this yet they still focus on the negative. It’s like an addiction for them.
My Mom for example is like this…
She knows very well about what you focus on you will find yet when she gets in her hypervigilant mode, her unconscious mind takes over and she starts scanning her environment for all the slight negatives.
Instead of enjoying the moment, she fixates on the slight annoyances and what she doesn’t realize is that brings about inappropriate feelings and emotions which then she acts out.
For example for Halloween, we gave out candy.
It’s a whole neighborhood tradition to setup tables in the driveway, and give out candy. It’s always fun.
In the middle of giving out candy (which she was enjoying) she started fixating on the negatives.
She mentioned that the music that was playing wasn’t good enough. She mentioned how this year there is too much candy left over compared to the previous year where we ran out early. She mentioned how the mosquitos that were biting me where just in my head. Etc.
Even though she was having fun she was so focused on the slight negatives that she couldn’t see all the good around her. She was blind to the good until I had to start pointing it out to her.
The perfect sunset. The trick-or-treaters. The abundance of candy we had (that I could now take home). The fact that we had music this year vs no music the previous year, etc.
Not to mention the more she focused on the negative the more it was bringing down the mood of others as they started to focus on the perceived negatives she was pointing out.
Of course this is a totally unconscious act of a person who is being hyper vigilant to their surroundings.
I turned things around for her..
I said to her.. “Aren’t you glad we have music this year vs not having it last year? Aren’t you glad we have enough candy this year compared to the previous year? Look at the sunset, isn’t it awesome?, etc”.
I had to point out the positives and the more I did that the more she turned around in her thinking instead of spiraling into the negative.
The power of focusing on the positive can not be understated.
What we focus on we Manifest.
When you start your day with the intention of assuming the positive and looking for the good in all situations and experiences, you will see the positive more readily apparent. And when you see the positive, you will have thoughts about that, and when you have thoughts about that you will have feelings and emotions about that as well, which then influences our behaviors. This is manifesting.
Manifesting is as simple as aligning your thoughts to what it is you desire because if you can do that, your behaviors will automatically align to what it is you want to experience.
What are aligned thoughts?
They are thoughts of whatever it is you desire working out in your favor no matter how it looks.
This means.. You assume it will work out for you, that it will work in your favor. You see yourself in the end, with whatever it is you desire. You hold on to the thought of it working out for you.
As you hold those thoughts you will have automatic emotions and feelings which are used to fuel your behaviors.
- Set the Intention first thing in the morning that Everything is Working out For you (“Everything is working out in my Favor“).
- Assume that whatever it is you desire will happen no matter what it looks like now.
- With that knowing, have aligned thoughts for what it is you desire that are positive and assuming everything will work out in your favor
- As you go through your day, consciously look for the positives (not the negatives)
- Take inspired action towards what most aligns with your desire (As you are focused on positive assumptions, you will have automatic ideas and thoughts towards actions you should take.. take them!)
- No matter the outcome see the positive in it (Celebrate your successes.)
If your feelings and emotions are not that of excitement and assurance, you need to reflect on why they aren’t; often it is because of a self-limiting belief that you are holding onto. Investigate your beliefs about what it is you desire, link them to the strongest emotion of your past, heal that wound.
But if you can get excited from your thoughts, then you are in alignment.
Now use that excitement to boldly move forward keeping the mindset that whatever happens it will work out for your best and highest good.
Now there may be some setbacks or it may appear differently than you first imagined but that’s okay, use whatever happens as a stepping stone, learning from it, gaining from it, in order to propel you forward. Often times it won’t happen all all once because we can only handle a certain amount of change at a time. This is normal.
This is the power of positive thinking.. because when you can think positively, it aligns your thoughts, feelings, emotions and behaviors toward the thing you desire. It makes manifesting effortless.
To add to this point, you can think negatively and manifest that in your life just as easily as you think positively.. just the outcome will be negative.
Regardless it’s up to each of us to be consciously aware of our thoughts for what we think of we are manifesting, whether good or bad.
This concept is hugly empowering if you fully understand and embrace it.
Many people see themselves as victims of their circumstances, unaware that they have control over their reactions, which ultimately shape their experiences.
Everything can carry either a positive or negative meaning; it’s up to us to choose how we perceive it. Will we focus on the positive or the negative? Or will we simply conform to society’s view of the situation?
I for one will assume the positive. I for one will look for the lesson, look for the silver lining. I for one will look for the positives in any and all situations.
And since I started with this mindset years ago, I have not had a bad day since. That’s the power of positive thinking.
